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MIKE MCHONE.COM

Officially the unofficial website of Mike McHone!

Bio(hazard)graphy

Pictured: An early photo of the author.

Since you're here, you've probably read one of Mike's stories... or saw his picture up at the post office. Keep reading if you're curious. And if you're not, keep reading anyway. What else are you doing?

Mike McHone is an American writer, former journalist, and kinda/sorta part-time musician, and somewhat funny former comedian. Impressed yet?
 

Mike was born in Monroe, Michigan, a small city, just south of Detroit. He is an only child because perfection has no competition.

His parents were avid readers, which was odd because both of them were illiterate. Elmore Leonard and Kinky Friedman were among his father’s favorites, while Edgar Allan Poe and Joyce Carol Oates were his mother’s. He has cited these writers as influences along with Gregory Mcdonald, Harlan Ellison, Flannery O’Connor, John Steinbeck, and whoever it was that wrote the Uncle John's Bathroom Reader books.
 

Writing Career (or a Reasonable Facsimile Thereof)

After graduating high school in the 90's, McHone moved from location to location over the next eight years and held jobs in factories, retail shop, security, and sales. When he wasn't employed (which was often), he kept busy by being lazy, drunk, and playing guitar and bass in bands throughout the Detroit and Toledo areas. He once auditioned for the lead guitarist position for the heavy metal band Anthrax. He didn't get the gig, which is obvious because he turned to writing as a vocation. Lucky him.

A few months after enrolling in a community college in 2003, McHone was invited to write for the school newspaper where his articles were spotted by editors at various papers throughout the southeastern Michigan, northwest Ohio, and northeast Indiana markets which led to a career in freelancing. Within the year, McHone had secured a position as a fulltime reporter, as well as a music critic and editor for the award-winning magazine Clamor in Toledo, and columnist for the short-lived, but oh-so-fondly remembered Detroit music magazine The Record.

By 2014 his work had appeared in The AV Club, Neo-Opsis Science Fiction Magazine, The Detroit News, The Toledo Blade, Hustler, and Playboy. (And just for clarification, he submitted jokes and short humor pieces to Hustler and Playboy, not photos for centerfold layouts, so don't get excited.)

Recently

In 2018, after working in the journalism field for many years, McHone wrote "This Used to be a Quiet Town," "From Green to Red," "A Drive-by on Chalmers Road?" and "K. O'Connor," the first four stories in a series dubbed The Midport Mysteries. All of these stories found homes in the pages of Mystery Weekly, Ellery Queen, and Mystery Tribune. 

F.A.Q. (Friggin' Annoying Questions)

Question: So, how do you pronounce your last name?

Answer: McHone. As in “Mick”-“Hone.” Not MaHone, MaHome, Mahoney, or Michonne. 
 

What do you like to write?

Words mostly, sometimes numbers.


 

Hey! Do you want to read this new novel, short story, novella, poem, or grocery list I’m working on?

Hey! No.


 

Dude, why not?

Dude, because I’m:

a.) too busy working on my own stuff

b.) reading something else that’s already been published

c.) not interested because it might suck

d.) not interested because it might be a work of genius and I’d get jealous

e.) both a and c

f.) both b and d

g.) both q and x


Bro, did you know you’re kind of a dick?

Bro, yes.


 

Where were you born?

I was born in a crossfire hurricane. If you get the reference you and I could probably be friends. But seriously I was born in a quiet, little town on Krypton.

 

What do you like to do in your spare time?

I like to go ice fishing in the summer, and I like collecting and refurbishing two and four-wheeled unicycles. Also, every Halloween I love dressing up as Santa Claus and passing out Easter candy to the kids. Confuses the hell out of them.

I read that you're a musician. What instruments do you play?

Guitar, bass, mandolin, and piano. 

Favorite bands/artists?

Jesus... Here we go... Frank Zappa, the Beatles, Motorhead, Rush, Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Bruce Springsteen, Tom Waits, the Rolling Stones, Iggy Pop/The Stooges, Metallica, Warren Zevon, Neil Young, Van Halen, Ozzy Osbourne, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, Judas Priest, Megadeth, Genesis, Pink Floyd, the Doors, Cream, Danzig/Samhain/the Misfits, Ronnie James Dio, Rainbow, Johnny Cash, Type O Negative, Queen, David Bowie, Clutch, Jimi Hendrix, Ramones, Nick Cave, Leonard Cohen, the Who, Roy Orbison, Slayer, Michael Hedges, Miles Davis, Bob Dylan, the Sex Pistols, Ween, John Coletrane, Anthrax, Mike Patton/Faith No More/Mr. Bungle/Phantomas, Patsy Cline, Prince, Social Distortion, Jaco Pastorius, John Prine, John Hiatt, Rage Against the Machine, Steve Earle, Peter Gabriel... Okay. Enough. I'm done.    


Aside from your stuff, do you have any stories/novels/writers you would recommend reading?

Yes. Good ones. Other than that, check out Robert B. Parker, Leo Rosten, Harry Crews, Sara Paretsky, Gregory Mcdonald, Terry Southern, Cormac McCarthy, Elmore Leonard, Kinky Friendman, Joyce Carol Oates, Ray Bradbury, Harlan Ellison, Bukowski, Hemingway, Celine, Vonnegut, Dickenson, Plath, and Steinbeck.    


 

Can I have your personal address so I can send you a letter or package?

Ha! Funny!


 

No, seriously.

 

Are you stupid?


 

If you were stranded on a desert island, what wo-

Stop. Just… stop.

Any advice for writers?

 

Yeah. Write something. Then try to get it published. If it gets published, hooray. If not, it more than likely means your writing needs to improve or it just wasn't meant to be. Either way, move on, write another story and submit that one. Repeat as desired.

Seriously?

Yeah, seriously.


 

Really?

How are you not getting this?